Computer jokes

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My computer made a funny sound the other day.
Of course, I've never heard it get thrown out a window before.

Rating: 4.0 |

Q. What creature has the best aptitude for engineering ?

A. The spider -- It has its own website.

Rating: 4.0 |

Jesus and Satan got into an argument over which of them was the better computer programmer. Finally God got tired of the bickering and told them that he would judge a contest between them. They each had four hours to write the best program they could, and then God would decide the winner.

Well, they both got right down to business, and wrote lines and lines and lines of code. But just before the four hours were up there was a flash of lightning and a tremendous clap of thunder. The lights flickered, the power faltered, and both computer screens went dead.

When power was restored, God declared that time was up and asked to see the results of their work. Jesus flipped on his computer and displayed the most elegant program you could imagine, with beautiful architecture and wonderful syllogisms, triumphs of multimedia sound and pictures -- all kinds of bells and whistles.

God asked Satan what he had created, but Satan said, "I've got nothing, absolutely nothing. My program was twice as good as that, but I lost it all when the power went out. Jesus must have cheated. How could he still have such a great program?"

God replied, "Everybody knows -- Jesus Saves."

Rating: 3.0 |

Q: What's the difference between a car salesman and a computer salesman? A: The car salesman can probably drive!

Rating: 3.0 |

As most technophiles are aware, there are special programs to run scanners. These programs use a TWAIN driver to perform the scanning. TWAIN, the acronym, stands for "Technology Without An Interesting Name."

Rating: 3.0 |

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